Starting Over - Don’t Let the Past Control Your Future!
Life happens in stages, phases, chapters, whatever you want to call it, and none of them last forever. Stages and phases are typically used to describe the DEVELOPMENT of something, whether a human, animal, plant, etc., but they can both be used for adults as well since throughout life we are developing - mentally, physically, socially. And every phase of life has a LESSON to teach you. You need to learn the lessons and grow from them, but then let go of that phase so you can move on in your GROWTH and focus on the present phase of your life. Live, learn, and move on.
Sometimes we feel like total failures - yes me too - and we may feel like we have just made mistake after mistake and there’s nothing we can do to fix anything. Good news - you don’t have anything to fix! It was a moment. Maybe a LONG moment. And when I say “mistake”, I just mean that things didn’t go as planned and we’re not happy with the outcome. Don’t worry if you made a mistake or two along the way. We all do! Some of the most BEAUTIFUL things in life come from our mistakes.
So now you have decided it’s time to move on with life or a particular PIECE of your life. The first thing you need to do is actually the hardest - LET GO OF THE PAST! Oh that’s so much easier said than done, right?! The thing is, you can’t totally commit to this new JOURNEY, a new endeavor, starting over, unless you give ALL of your strength and energy to letting go of the past so you can make a new beginning. Letting go doesn’t mean forgetting. If we forget, we are likely to have a REPEAT. And if it’s a terrible loss you have experienced in your life, as I have when my daughter passed, you don’t want to forget. You want to hang on with all of your might. You have memories. PRECIOUS memories. But you still have to find a way to continue with your life. You are still here, even if it only feels like you are physically present because you have mentally checked out. God is NOT done with you yet!
You can’t CHANGE the past, it’s impossible. But you can and should LEARN from it. If you don’t look at a painful circumstance in a constructive way that allows you to uncover that teachable aspect of it, you are most likely going to repeat it.
And NEVER feel guilty for starting again. It’s never too late to start over and have a redo in life. In fact, you probably have started over many times in your life, but you just didn’t realize it. Every year of school you started all over again, right? New things to learn, new teacher(s) to know, new routines, new friends. College - the same thing but on a much larger level. First job, new job, maybe another and another new job. It’s perfectly NORMAL to start over again in the job market, it’s called growing and progressing. Why, then, do we not see that same thing, that same growth and progress when it comes to a more profound change in our life? Starting YOU over again can be scary, no doubt. What if you fail? What if you THRIVE?!?!
My friends, life is a CYCLE of endings and new beginnings. Life is constantly changing. And even though we might look at change and starting over as difficult, there is a bounty of BEAUTY and grace hidden in those obstacles of life, waiting for you to harvest. Hidden so deep you can’t see it at first. But as you search for that lesson within the circumstances, you will eventually uncover it. That beauty will be REVEALED as you continue on your journey.
As Lao Tzu states, “New beginnings are often disguised as painful endings.” I love that! It is so true.
Nobody can go back and make a whole new beginning at anything in their life, however, everyone has the ability to start over from where they are and write a new CHAPTER in their life.
So learn what the past has taught you. What did it reveal to you about yourself or others? Look for the lesson or lessons to help you GROW from within. But then it is equally important that you also make it a point to let go of the past. Remember, you can’t change it. Learn from it, EMBRACE the knowledge and power it unveiled, and use it to mold your future - your new, better than before because I learned from the past - better you. Write the next chapter of YOU!
Your experiences teach you - every one of them does. Either positive or negative, you learn from them. Whether it's about YOU or OTHERS, you learn from them. You learn not to repeat the negative. Set up boundaries to ensure you don’t repeat them! And take those positive experiences and hit replay often.
Recreate your life. Write a new chapter. Focus your energy on what lies ahead.
Don’t let the past control your future. You have the POWER to let go of the past - untie it, unchain it, take it off, wad it up and throw it into the incinerator. Now take a step, move on and don’t look back.
Remember that it’s the LITTLE things in life that matter. Little moments, little memories, little STEPS along the way that make you who you are. Yes, sometimes you will struggle, but each morning when the sun rises is a new day, a new opportunity. Your STORY isn’t over. Life can be incredibly hard sometimes, but you’re still here for a reason. Make the best of it! Let go of the past so that it loses its grip and control in your life so you don’t stress so much about the future, and ENJOY the present.
“Embrace the newness of life everyday, be thankful for endings instead of constantly reliving the lost. Life is worth living everyday and with its endings is the unique blessing of beginning something new.” ~ Scott Patrick Erwin
You’ve got this, my friends! Make this the best and most exciting chapter in the story of YOU!
